James grew up in a household where sex wasn’t talked about. It wasn’t a politically conservative home, but discussions about intimacy, confidence, and body image were simply nonexistent. “We’re all grown now, some of us even have kids—which, guess what, had to involve sex. But for some reason, that never translated into talking about how to build sex into a healthy relationship.”
Like many men, James entered adulthood with a limited and unrealistic understanding of what made someone “sexy.” His confidence was shaped by high school health class and, as he put it, “a certain p-word (rhymes with ‘cornography’).” For years, he believed conventional attractiveness was the defining factor in desirability. As a chubby kid, that belief hit hard, affecting his self-image and ability to build intimacy.
Through dedication, James transformed his body, building muscle and cultivating an aesthetic he was proud of. But he learned something even more powerful: “It definitely helps to look aesthetically sexy, but confidence is key to be truly sexy.”
Taking the Leap into Boudoir
James discovered Allebach Photography through an Instagram post, and while the idea of a boudoir session intrigued him, it also terrified him. “There’s this sense of loss of control. Any intimate photos I’ve ever taken or posted or sent to someone, I was in control of everything, and that sort of allowed me to mask my insecurities.”
But then, a scene from Schitt’s Creek echoed in his mind—the one where Moira Rose urges a younger woman to “take a thousand naked photos of yourself right now.” James decided to take that quote to heart, adding his own end to the quote: “…and I was sexy as hell.”
It was time to celebrate his body.
Embracing the Experience
For his session, James wanted to bring elements that represented who he was in his own space. “It was a mix of comfortable athletic leisure, sexy underwear that shows off my favorite half (the lower one, close contest though), and leather.”
Before the shoot, he felt the perfect blend of nervousness and excitement. “I really did not know what to expect.”
During the session? Total transformation. “I left the photoshoot feeling very relaxed for having just been in my underwear (sometimes less).”
Seeing Himself in a New Light
James was stunned when he saw his images for the first time. “Now, I’m not an emotional man, so the bar is fairly low, but… closest I’ve ever come to crying when looking at photos of myself. It felt like a real celebration of me—the parts of me that I love, the parts that I’ve been made to feel less than for.”
When selecting his artwork, he focused on variety. “I wanted photos that were unique, that showed my confidence as much as my body, and ones that I would want to keep and look at forever. And ones that if my future partner didn’t look at and go ‘awooga’ (or some variation of a 90s cartoon character with heart eyes and drool), then he would be sleeping on the couch.”
Why Every Man Should Do Boudoir
For James, the session changed the way he saw boudoir. “Most physique or model photography uses lighting and Photoshop to change different parts of your body; boudoir uses those tools to highlight those parts. That means every body truly comes across as unique, sexy, attractive, and confident.”
His advice for other men considering a session? “A lot of people think you have to be naked or in intimate underwear. Boudoir is about comfort just as much as actual sex. So my advice would be: just come in what represents you, embrace who you are in the bedroom, and don’t feel like you have to bring someone out you’re not.”
The Allebach Experience
James’ favorite part of the entire experience was working with Mike and Erika. “It’s very clear they had the experience to construct a vision and they knew what works—just look at the results! But also, they were very open. A lot of photographers I’ve worked with have been very directive, very ‘do this, I want this pose.’ With Mike and Erika, it felt more like a collaboration. Having the ability to make my own adjustments or ideas really made the photos look and feel more natural.”
Final Thoughts
James left his session with a new appreciation for himself—and for boudoir as an art form. “Male modeling or boudoir definitely is not just for a single body type. Every man is sexier with a little bit of confidence required to pose in front of a camera.”
So, to the men out there who think boudoir isn’t for them—think again. Confidence is key, and as James so perfectly put it…
“Take a thousand photos of yourself right now… and know you were sexy as hell.”
James took the leap and discovered a whole new level of confidence. Now it’s your turn! Whether you’re looking to embrace your body, celebrate a milestone, or simply step outside your comfort zone, a boudoir session with Allebach Photography is an unforgettable experience. Book your session today and redefine what confidence means to you!
Schedule a call with us here! https://meetme.so/allebachphone